To My Conservative Friends Who Think That By Being Born on Third Base They Must Have Hit a Triple

To my conservative friends from humble beginnings who believe their success was self-generated:
First, if you can read this, you benefited from a public education system that had a government employee teach you. Many of the poorest on this planet are illiterate and have no hope of schooling of any kind. Indeed, were we to return to a pre-Jeffersonian system where only the wealthy hired tutors and public education was considered a radical luxury no government was in the business of guaranteeing or providing, you would have been unable to understand or respond to what I am writing now. 
You did not work in a sweat shop in Vietnam or serve as a gun runner for warlords in some Mexican village or a child soldier in Somalia. 
You had access to vaccinations, medicines, and clean running water and sewage that were all provided at public expense to you or your family (you could not have attended school without the former). 
You had safe, government-inspected roads and probably had some means of transportation with government-mandated safety devices such as seat belts. 
You ate government-inspected food that did not kill you. 
I bet you had shoes and even the ability to bathe regularly. You may not have had three cars and a vacation, but you probably were not hungry most of the time or walking 5 hours a day to fetch water, as is true for the world's poorest citizens. 
In other words, you didn't just survive childhood (something many of the poorest children don't do) and appear educated and ready to enter the business world by magic. You had an entire village of invisible helpers, most of them publicly funded and paid for by taxpayers so that the accidents of your birth would not condemn you to a life of poverty or an early death. 
And yes, you benefited from a socialized police and fire department that kept your streets relatively safe (compared to Mogadishu or Karachi, let's say) and allowed you to get to school and back each day and not find your house or apartment had burned down. 
So please stop begrudging all these benefits you enjoyed, man up and pay for them.  Find a cop or teacher and say thank you.  Ask how you can help pay back the society that gave you so much even if you did not appreciate it at the time. 
And stop trying to deny those same services to the least among us who deserve the same opportunities for hard work and success as you were given.